Friday, April 25, 2008

You

The house alarm chimes, "Inside Garage Door" every evening and I breathe a big sigh of happiness and relief. You're home. It feels so good when you're home. Not only because I now have another set of hands to help with the girls, but because they are your hands. You immediately pick up Lily and spin her around as she yells, "DAaadddyyyyyyy!!"- which simultaneously picks up my spirits as I do another double spin of being crazy in love with you.

The other night when I left the house in a tizzy at 8:30pm, stressed from the seemingly endless bouts of coughs and fevers and misery that both you and I had been monitoring with poor Ms. Lily, I slowly perused the aisles of Target and thought of you. As if Lily's hideous flu bug wasn't enough for her poor little body to fight, she had slipped in the shower on Sunday morning while we were trying to allow the steam to loosen her barking cough. It wasn't a terrible fall, but she got a small cut on the back of her head, and as I know from having 7 siblings and plenty of head wounds- head cuts tend to bleed, a LOT. You, my studly man's man of a husband, didn't know this, and in a moment of the purest parental panic started screaming,
"She's bleeeeeeding!!!! She's bleeeeding!!!"
"Tyler! It's okay, head wounds bleed! Don't freak out like that in front of her, you're going to scare her!"
I thought about this and smiled. You love her just like I love her. That deep, soul wrenching, makes you freak out and start hyperventilating when you see her bleed kind of love.

You drive one of the world's ugliest cars known to mankind. Every day, you wake up early to commute in that vile hunk of metal to head to a job to work for me, and our girls. You never complain. I don't get that! I always complain. There was one time, however, when you were able to borrow my Dad's Toyota Tundra for a week or so. After you arrived home, you jokingly informed me of some girls who were trying to get your attention at a stop light while you were in this impressive rig. I smiled and actually wished you could have more opportunities like that, riding in a vehicle that was a closer match to how handsome you really are. Not because of the girls though...when I catch them they will pay dearly for their flirty ways. One day, I know you will have the car of your dreams, because that is how you work. And even in that car, I know I will never have to worry about the flirty girls along the way - they'll never be able to catch you, because that is most definitely not how you work. I pity the poor souls, really, because that just gives them all the more justifiable reason to want to chase.

When you and I finally get a moment or two of alone time, on any given day, you always squeeze in a heartfelt, "I love you, Rae", "Come sit with me", or the too oft unanswered "Wanna get it on (wink wink)?". You are so good at that. I, on the other hand, only seem to excel in stress-monging cleaning bouts, living in a constant state of frenzied vacuuming and dishwashing when the girls are finally in bed or with sitters. I am a hideous wife at times, barking orders and being an all around un-fun drill sargent. I live in a perpetual state of, "I wish I could be more like him". It is pitifully ironic because at times I think I most unknowingly make you feel like you've done something wrong.

Even in a frenzy, I do receive those blessed, time-stopping moments of clarity and gratitude for you. Do I always mention them? I wish I did. There are too many to count. And yet, when I do pause and vocally remind you of how amazing I think you are...as a husband, as a father, as a man, as my best friend, you simply shrug your shoulders in the sweetest humility, brushing it off as if it isn't that big of a deal. But, it is a big deal. You are a big deal. You are MY big deal.
And even when I am Miss Crazy Woman, I will never be crazy enough to forget, and appreciate that fact. Thank you for walking this road with me...the journey is so amazingly beautiful because of you.

I love you.

2 comments:

Amy said...

Rae - I'm so excited to be one of the "Blogs You Read". Woo hoo!!

You are my favorite blog to read (even out of the ones whose writers are like, published)!

As for you and Ty, I don't know how you guys do it. You pull off being a great fun supportive couple without being annoying! That's a huge feat.

Joan Koplin said...

Tears, Rae. Yes, tears.
Gosh, I see so much of you and Tyler in me and Brandon. We are similar creatures aren't we? Stress prone, crazy type A perfectionists (attempting perfection in sometimes silly and unnecessary ways)...when all the while we have husbands who honor us, love us, and truly LIVE for us.