Friday, September 19, 2014

A sneak peek.

Act I

Scene: Bedroom, 11pm. Husband enters in and collapses onto bed beside wife. Hair is tousled, business shirt un-tucked. Remarkably handsome. Wife is in sweat pants and faded Frugo's yogurt t-shirt. She puts laptop and various school texts aside as they look at each other with droopy, tired eyes and half smiles. They review the day, their daughters' various activities, the sad state of the laundry pile sitting beside the bed, the list of upcoming events, the schedule for the next morning, the items that need to be checked off on their mounting daily lists. A brief "nose goes" game ensues to determine who will have to go back downstairs and make sure all the lights are off (him). Wife puts in retainers. Remarks with a loud lisp about how they also double as excellent teeth-grinding protection for TMJ. Husband is visibly trying to restrain his overwhelming manly desires over such hotness.

Both settle in and prepare for slumber with the usual ninety-pound mental weight of life's responsibilities visible in their sleepy shoulders. They slump into the pillows.

Sit quietly in the darkness.

 About 30 seconds pass.

Suddenly, the silence is broken.

Wife: "Hey! Haack. LISTEN. I KNOW WHAT WE SHOULD DO."

Husband:"What?"

W: "We should SELL OUR HOUSE and MOVE."

H: "Sigh, I love selling and moving. All of that paperwork. And those boxes."

W: "And buy A SMALLER HOUSE."

H: "Yes....YES. Completely agree. One with LESS space for our LARGE family."

W: "Totes. A house that IS OLD TOO."

H: " OVER ONE HUNDRED AND TEN YEARS OLD, at LEAST."

W: "OH MY GOSH! I WAS THINKING THE EXACT SAME NUMBER!"

H: "And...preferrably one that needs WORK?"

W: "mMMM HMMMMM. We DEFINITELY need more WORK. Lots and lots of WORK. Maybe one with some termite damage."

H: "Yep. Fo sho."*

{*except husband never really ever says anything even remotely resembling a term like "fo sho" but for all intensive purposes of screenplay authenticity the screen-writer insists that he meant exactly that.}

W: "And WHY should we do this, one might ask? Because we are AWESOME. DECISION. MAKERS."

H: "That's why."

W: "THE BEST DECISION MAKING PEOPLE EVER."

H: "Word."**

{**Refer to above note. Same applies.}

W: "And while we do THAT, let's also WRITE A BOOK titled, "How to Lose the Balance you've never Maintained to Begin With"

H: "I like where your head's at. Now... let's get. it. oooOOOoon."

W: "Like donkey KONG."***

{***That part is accurate. Word for word.}

andddd....


CUT.

..............................................................................................................................................


Act II

Scene: the house.



.......................................................................................................

Act III
{screenwriter to audience}


Guys

I'm freaking out excited.

We've officially bitten off more than we can chew.

Look at that beauty!!! Such a gem.

Stay tuned, this is only the beginning...can't wait to tell you all about it.










2 comments:

Katherine said...

Perfectly written. Just think how calm things will seem after going through the remodel and all you have going on is four kids, piano lesson, and school;)

Joan said...

It's SO perfect, Rae! SO much cozy character and romantic charm.
The only thing I HATE more than potty training is moving. Those two things will definitely be two activities in HELL. hahaha.
Like potty training...moving is worth it b/c you are going from one thing that is good (diapers/old house) to cute cotton undies and the potential for the perfect home.

Wow. That comparison/analogy/whatever the crap you want to call it---is a stretch! We speak the same language though so I know you understand perfectly what I'm trying to say.